Monday, March 14, 2011

On the emulation of cetaceans

In the recent past, I have come across a method of aqueous locomotion described as "Total immersion". The purpose of this is to achieve a movement similar to the mammalian beasts that dwell within the ocean, most notably that of the dolphin or porpoise.

Whereas the orthodox are firmly entrenched in the belief that movement through water is merely exertion against it, this technique takes the opposite view and describes a movement that is smooth and effortless, enabling the practitioner to cover vast distances with ease.

Upon viewing several motion pictures and visual depictions of this method, I and my trusty friend Mr. S, have been engaged in practice over the past few weeks. I daresay that we have made some progress, but it requires the patience of a turtle and the flexibility of an eel.

It is my hope that within the span of a few months, we would get adept enough that we would not be the laughing stock of orcas and dolphins all around the world.

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